Let Your Novel’s Villain — or Inner Demon — Make an Entrance (According to Brain Science)

Gina Kammer Author

Let your villain make an entrance that leaves a lasting impression! We can brainstorm ways to put this into practice by using brain science insights.

Let Your Novel's Villain (or Inner Demon) Make an Entrance

What Brain Science Says about Writing with Story Structures #7

The insights from cognitive psychology can help us understand the effects and usefulness of story structures, and this is what I break down in this series. In these articles on story structure elements, I dive into the effects of story on readers and how these structures play a part in that. I also offer suggestions for what writers can do to have the best of both worlds — both the joy of just writing and creating a tale readers will want to read.

After making an impossible, life-altering choice, your protagonist risks the consequences for his or her actions based on that choice. Whether in the form of a villain or a type of inner demon, the enemy approaches. This is called the first pinch point in a simple three-act structure. However, I like to name each beat for a more character-centered structural approach, and therefore I think calling it something like the first complication is more intuitive.

While somewhat fluid, this plot beat still has some major purposes to fulfill. Better yet, it can be employed for great effect — let your villain make an entrance that leaves a lasting impression! We can brainstorm ways to put this into practice by using insights from brain science on the effects stories have on readers. So let’s craft villains with specific purpose for the best possible impact on readers.

What Is the First Complication?

The first complication (also called a “pinch point”) is a major beat in a story that reveals the main antagonist and clarifies the stakes. It usually happens before the protagonist has fully entered the “new world” setting — or the situation outside of the character’s status quo. In other words, it might occur at the end of the first act.*

*Note: The first pinch point is often pegged in the second act in three-act structure diagrams. It’s often true that whether the first pinch point is considered part of the first or second act, it still falls at roughly the same point in novels. But I’ve also seen diagrams put it at the end of act one, and honestly, that feels like a more appropriate break to me. 

Let’s also remember that act breaks aren’t actually clear in novels. In a play though, we might see the curtain come down at these act breaks. So on one hand, I don’t think it matters where exactly you want to say your act one shifts into act two for a novel. On the other hand, I like to imagine novels more like movies in my head and, in that case, it’s fun to think about where a cliffhanger break might take place. 

Sometimes it might feel more appropriate after the first plot point when the protagonist has just taken his or her first major action to join the main story conflict. However, like in some of the examples I’ll share below, that pinch point sometimes occurs before the shift to the new world. And for those stories, it feels like the curtain should fall after the antagonist has somehow threatened and before the protagonist fully arrives in the new world of the story.

Who or What Constitutes an Antagonist?

Not all speculative stories are high fantasy adventure quests as those that follow in the Tolkien genre revolution. Even if they do, contemporary fiction often favors villains with more nuance than Sauron. Some don’t even contain obvious external villains. So does this beat work across all stories?

I would argue yes! Even stories without a villain require conflict. In order for a story to engage readers, it needs to show how the character transforms to overcome obstacles and adversity. Change isn’t usually prompted by things trucking along comfortably and as they always have. Some kind of wrench needs to be thrown into those repetitive gears to force things to turn in another direction.

While antagonists can be evil overlords and dark wizards, they can also be a character’s own inner demons (which are sometimes quite literal in fantasy!). Whoever or whatever it is, it just has to be some kind of opposition that will show up again to bring the protagonist low before the story’s climax. What’s more important is the purpose of the antagonist.

Craft Your Villains with Purpose

While the topic of creating villains is probably a whole article by itself, it’s worth overviewing a few key pieces here. Dreaming up crime bosses and manipulative queens are some of the best parts of brainstorming a novel. But if they can’t be made to directly antagonize the protagonist in a way that matters for the protagonist’s final transformation, that work (no matter how fun) isn’t actually worth anything.

The external plot arc cannot be separated from the internal character transformation arc. If it can, the story is not a cohesive whole — it’s just a series of events without meaning. So make sure your antagonist is fulfilling the right role.

The antagonist should be your protagonist’s tailor-made enemy. That means the very character or nature of the villain (or whatever it is) perfectly suited to trigger your protagonist’s inner fear-based demons. In this way, the villain will serve a momentous role in not only the plot arc but also the character arc for your protagonist. The villain will goad your protagonist at every turn until finally your protagonist is forced to face those deep fears.

Time for Your Villain to Make an Entrance

So, early in your story — after your main character has committed to participating in the main conflict — you need to make clear to your readers the antagonist that approaches. Even if the antagonist isn’t yet physically present, something should show that the antagonist is somewhere out there and is a problem. This is true even if your villain’s true identity is hidden. 

Consider again how your main character has just made a brutal or otherwise challenging decision in light of his or her particular brand of fear. This protagonist is just getting her feet under her and coming to terms with the consequences of her actions coming out of that decision. What could shake that new, tentative foundation the most?

Let your villain crash into that foundation before its cement is even dried. It will be memorable for readers because they care about your main character and how your character views everything. Some antagonistic force that rattles whatever newly born courage your main character has mustered will create the suspense that keeps readers going to find out how your main character will overcome such a threat. It’s a selfish reader response: subconsciously your readers are looking to learn from your character’s tough situations from a safe position.

To better explain how this works, let’s review these moments in some of the iconic story examples we’ve been looking at in previous posts:

The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring

The Black Riders* hunt the hobbits on their way to Buckland and then Rivendell, showing that the enemy is already in the Shire and confirming Frodo’s need to leave it. However, their appearance also confirms what great danger Frodo is in and how risky his decision in the first plot point was. Plus, these villains embody the full corruption of the Ring, something Frodo deeply fears.

*Note that the Ringwraiths are already present and show the nature and threat of the antagonistic force while the hobbits are still in the Shire. Until the hobbits enter the Old Forest, they’re not fully beyond the familiar territory of their old world, which (if we consider the new world to be fully a part of act two) seems to mean that the first pinch point falls before act two. That doesn’t mean there cannot be additional pinch points to follow (think Weathertop).

Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone:

The first complication* is the first time Harry’s scar hurts while looking at Snape at Hogwarts. The pain shows a threat that hasn’t been part of Harry’s life up until being brought into the wizarding world and is sufficiently ominous. It also sets him further apart from his new peers by making him once again that much more different from them. 

But Snape is the decoy, not the true antagonist. Remember that Harry looks past Quirrell’s turban in which Voldemort directly resides when he sees Snape. While Quirrell/Voldemort is still the hidden villain, clues are present while Snape outwardly fulfills the beat to full satisfaction for the reader. 

(Because the inconsistency always made me ask questions, I want to point out that Harry’s scar doesn’t hurt when Harry first meets Quirrell in the Leaky Cauldron since Voldemort wasn’t yet an intimate part of him. That “union” happened just before the students’ arrival at Hogwarts.)

*This beat does seem to happen in the new world and therefore in act two — if that’s how we’re splitting up the acts.

The Hunger Games:

Just before Katniss and Peeta start their training for the Hunger Games, Katniss recognizes an Avox — a traitor to the state who is enslaved and whose tongue is cut out. Katniss has seen the redheaded girl captured in the woods and the boy who was with her killed and his body taken. This moment is an early demonstration of the excessive power used by Panem to maintain totalitarian control. It brings home the reality for Katniss and is further emphasized as a foreshadowing of Katniss’s own ordeal by her guilt over watching and not acting to help her.

While I realize the more obvious pinch point is likely as the Games begin and tributes are quickly killed while Katniss runs away from the initial bloodbath, this point is quite expected. It also doesn’t come from the real antagonist. Although I could argue that the Careers are primary antagonists for this first book in the series and the immediate opposition to Katniss’s goals to get home to Prim, it’s always made pretty clear through Katniss’s thoughts and her disenchanted experiences in District 12 that the Capitol is really to blame. 

This point also doesn’t impact her inner conflicts as much as the earlier surprise recognition of the Avox girl. However, a bit after the games begin, when Katniss realizes Peeta has sided with the Careers, she has a more internal reaction that might suffice. But the moment feels less connected to an antagonistic force. In any case, we still have both book and series arcs overlapping, so both points still have their places and multiple pinch points are always great for momentum.

In each example, the presence of a villain in some form or another raises stakes. It clarifies what the protagonists are up against and doubles as a consequence of accepting the call to action. 

Chillin' Like Your Novel's Villain

What does it take to keep readers turning pages with ease? Give your protagonists tailor-made villains! A sense of progress through pinch points really helps and builds suspense.

Use them to hit your protagonists where it hurts to better push their transformations. Mwhahahaha!

Look for more ways to signpost progress and satisfy reader expectations in the coming posts on more key beats in story structure. They'll continue the thread of cause-and-effect for your outline or manuscript through both your plot structure and your character's arc of transformation to craft compelling science fiction and fantasy.

Categories: story structure